I’m asked to talk about her, and I feel tears well up in my eyes,

they ask me what’s wrong?

How could they possibly understand?

How could I possibly dislike someone

I held so dearly for so long?

Someone I believed was my soulmate, my forever best friend.

Teachers would always call us each other’s other halves,

So how does one come to wish

so deeply

To never be whole again?

They remember us running around during recess, playing pretend during pick up, and giggling

when her crush walked by;

How would they see the girl in the cage,

the one she mistook for a garden,

watering rusted bars like flowers?

How could they know about the nights I lay awake?

in my cage,

Crying and hurting,

Watching as my parents searched frantically

for a key they knew they’d never find,

a key locked inside there with me,

in hands too small to lift it.

Being near her felt like being in the perfect photograph, still, bright, beautiful;

but a picture you couldn’t leave without ruining.

She was someone everyone loved,

Her smile was sharp,

too sharp.

Her voice was sweet, the kind of sweet that sticks like syrup; warm and inviting,

but impossible to wash off.

Her hugs were always soft,

but tightened like vines;

slowly enough you’d only notice

when you’re fighting hard to breathe.

So how could they know

the person who loved her most

was her?

How could they know

the friendship they praised was a web,

sewn together by envy,

strands tugging tighter

the more you tried to move?

They couldn’t,

but I don’t know how to be the one to tell them that.

So instead I watch as the “perfect friend” I finally escaped finds someone else too naive to see

danger and run the other way.

I listen to you talk about her,

And the tears come rushing back.

Good or bad?

I’m not so sure,

I know I should be happy that you’ve found someone to go on this new adventure with,

But out of all the people in the world,

Did you need to choose her?

I thought I had left her grasp, that she couldn’t dictate my happiness anymore,

but as I see you two giggling about boys,

I know a part of me will always be hers.

You say she treats you better, that she regrets what she did, and that she’s changed,

but I’ve heard that lie too many times,

I can’t let myself believe her.

I’m not sure what I can do,

I know I can’t talk you out of it,

I know because I’ve tried.

I tried so hard to warn you.

She’s hurting you.

But twisted love has blinded you.

You can’t see what I see,

And I can’t stop it.

Watching you grow closer to the person I once considered a dear friend,

the person whose name

I can’t even bare to hear anymore,

I guess I must wait patiently, and hope you will come to realize you deserve better before you

find yourself where I was just a couple years ago;

trapped.

Wishing I’d never met her,

Wishing I’d just listened to them,

Wishing I’d let her go,

Wishing I’d been strong enough to let her go.

I listen to you talk to her, as tears trickle down.

Good or bad? Now I am sure,

I’m happy you’ve found someone to spend your time with,

I just wished it’d been anyone but

her.

Biography

My name is Gabriela Greco Tibirica. I am a sophomore at American Heritage on the pre-engineering track, and a few of my interests are music, reading, and baking.

What is your main source of inspiration?

I don’t think I have a single, main source of inspiration, but rather just enjoy writing about things as a way to process and express feelings that can be difficult not only to put into words, but also to share.

What motivated you to write this piece, and what is its message?

I was inspired to write this piece by a toxic friendship that lasted about five years and the deep sense of isolation and feeling trapped that came with it. I wanted to create something that would resonate with others who have struggled to put those emotions into words, like I once did. The poem shows how a friendship that feels like everything can quietly become painful and suffocating, and how even after you leave, its effects can linger in you and those around you.